Life Snippets

A lot has been going on, so it's been hard to fit in time to write about it. This post is just chock full of little things I've been thinking about or have enjoyed.

My dad alerted me to this article in the Greensboro, NC newspaper, about his long-time neighbor, Hilda Fountain. She just turned 101 years old, and as you can see, still has a great sense of humor. I guess I'll have to take the photo off if I ever make this blog public, but for now, enjoy this photo from the article!


Hilda is really an inspiration. She is so "with-it" and has such energy, even after dealing with breast cancer at age 98. It would be so wonderful to still be able to contribute to society, grow plants and harvest vegetables, and have all my faculties when I reach her age.

I debated long and hard about whether to do this, but in the end, I let Beccano have his Christmas gift early, even though he was once again slacking off on school work. I just could not figure out how to hide this huge guitar anyway. It's a Fender Jaguar bass. with an apparently very cool red head stock. To make it even cooler, he let me get him red Converse All Stars to go with the bass.



The good news is that because the bass is going out of production, it was deeply discounted. Better news is that I could get it at Danny Ray's rather than the big guitar store in town! Always happy to support local folks' businesses. Wow, Beccano is a happy boy with this, and he seems fine about not getting a lot of Christmas gifts, since this pretty much ate up his share, plus a bit. Now he has all the guitars I am going to get him for a decade or so, at least.

We had a stressful, yet fun, week at work last week. The Big Boss came to visit, so we all had to be in the office, looking busy. Of course, I don't think he even popped his head into the room where all the regular people work, but we had it looking good anyway. I even brought cookies, and the Ninja Genius guy made pumpkin bread. In the spirit of Halloween, Tuba/Train Man decorated our collection of buffalo using the office supplies I had lying around. One buffalo is going as the Easter Bunny for Halloween, while another has buffalo wings. The third is a pirate (that is an earring and eye patch on the left buffalo).


Sometimes we get a bit giddy after a lot of technical crapola. I was describing how there had been a mistake on a document, and my attempt at fixing it had made it worse, when I came out with this gem of a statement, "Two wrongs make a very wrong wrong." Everyone insisted it HAD to go on my whiteboard with another couple of little gems, after which Ninja Genius just had to add his two cents.

We survived one of those "team building" outings with the Big Boss, which mainly for me involved not eating fried food and watching the guys play pool in a smoky bar. I did at least get to have a free beer. I did my best to be friendly and act smart, since they are still trying to get me a permanent position. I tried to appear valuable.

At least all this stuff has helped the time pass waiting for Lee to get finished with his endless work trip. He got sick over the weekend, and I know that must have been hard. I hate being sick all alone.

I got cheered up a bit, anyway, with more enjoyment of the high school band. Here's a bonus shot of them in the stands playing the school song, which none of us parents have any idea what the words are, other than "O Shenandoah."




A real highlight of the past week or so came Saturday night. I decided I didn't want to spend Saturday night alone (Beccano had a date to see a movie with his girlfriend and a few other people). So I called Tuba Boy at the college and asked what he was doing. He said it was R's birthday--this is the girl from another country in their group, and it is her first birthday away from home. He was willing to eat with me, but also wanted to share her birthday with her.

So, his entire group of friends decided to join me at the Mexican restaurant near our house, where we had a very fun meal. She got sung to by the staff and had to wear the giant sombrero. Plus she got her first fried ice cream. It was incredibly cute. She is just one of those people whose adorableness quotient is very high.

Then they all trooped over to my house (8 kids in total) for tarot readings. They are all very interested (I had talked to the girls about it a bit in their suite last time I saw them), but one girl especially seems like she may be a real tarot person some day. It was a LOT of fun, though that many readings is tiring! They played with our dogs, which pleased the dogs a lot (they miss Lee). The kids paid attention, as much as college kids can, and asked lots of good questions. What struck me is how very lucky Tuba Boy is to have been assigned such a great group of kids to live and work with. Only one kid who was there was not a member of their "Living Learning Community," and he was the boyfriend of one of the girls--fit right in, though. I really enjoyed being around such a pleasant, intelligent and open-minded bunch of young people. Whoever assigned the living arrangements is a genius. They are like peas in a pod. What fun to get to know them all better!

I'm still trying to carve out time to write more. I just get real tired lately. All that reading and staring at the computer screen, I guess. But I really do like my job, so keep your fingers crossed that it stays!

College and Moving On

I guess enough time has passed that I can write about Tuba Boy (back to that name, since I think I may take this blog public soon) going off to college. We actually had a very good weekend, and I believe he and Debate Boy are having a good first week of first-year classes.

Below is a picture of the "learning-living environment," or whatever they are calling dorms these days, where the boys are now ensconced. Their room is the first floor room in the bend of the building, so you can tell they have a nice view of trees and a pathway out their window. We really lucked out in move-in--there is only one room in the whole school closer to the drop-off point, and that is their suitemates' room, which I think hears a lot of door openings and closings at night. I saw so many fathers looking exhausted from carrying their daughters' many possessions up to the third floor. We, on the other hand, took 5 minutes, since each boy had two family members to help, and hardly brought anything (they had us bring a few more things later, and we did go to Target for more supplies--along with half the school).

Here's a bit of an inside view of their room (right after we brought stuff in--it looks nicer now). The odd shape at least makes a room with cinder-block walls and industrial looking furniture slightly more interesting. To the left is the door to their bathroom, which they share with the suitemates (who have turned out to be their new best buds--real nice guys). Not bad at all. They have a small fridge and we got them a nice flat-screen TV, so they are happy. I am impressed, too, that they actually fixed up their rooms a bit. I think the idea that girls might drop by inspired it. The suite has a small sitting area, and one boy's parents got them a couple of chairs, so that is not bad. Anyway, it's a place a parent can feel comfortable leaving their kid near. There is a building under construction nearby, but it looks like they are close to being done with it, so that noise won't last long. Besides, any new building at that place is gorgeous and fancy, so it will be nice to look at when it is finished!
The school does things in a nice way. Kids move in on Friday, and there is a nice dinner in the very snazzy dining hall (featuring a "Dan Rather Room" that is quieter than the rest of the place). Then on Saturday, the kids get IDs and do other busy things, while the parents attend sessions, punctuated by more lovely meals. It is a nice way to gradually separate. Sunday there is more of that kind of thing (we skipped a couple of events, since we went home every night), and plenty of time to also hang out with your kid. You know, so you can give out last minute advice and such, as I am doing below.

Finally, on Sunday, there is a "convocation" ceremony, which is like the reverse of graduation. All the faculty show up in their academic regalia and file in, very solemly, followed by the new students. Then there are wonderful welcome speeches by the President of the University and others. They all pledge to help each other and abide by the honor code, and everybody sings the alma mater. It was really a nice thing, and I like the idea a lot. After that, we went home and I got weepy, but not too badly. Anyway, very dimly pictured below is the convocation (I forgot to put the camera on the "night" setting).


I have managed to get through this week, and have tried not to bother the boys too much. Just one call and a couple of emails. I just like hearing how they are doing, and what their seminar this week was like. Luckily we got all filled in last night, since last night they came to town to hang out with the kids who hadn't left for college yet. We were able to give them the giant remote control we'd bought them for their TV and used DVD player (which had lost its remote). It has camouflage on it and is quite oversized. They got as much of a kick out of it as the cashier at the electronics store did. The guys stayed at our house a half hour or so and filled us in on all they were doing. Between the two of them, there were lots of good stories!

And in the rest of life, Beccano is tentatively back in a band with Parker, and we will see how that goes. Mending fences. He's still in his other band, too. Can't be too busy. He may also start taking karate again, which I think would be good. He would trade for guitar lessons with his old karate teacher. This would mend fences, too. He left karate rather suddenly during his hard times, and it will be good to see them work together again. I hope this year school goes well for him. Fingers are crossed--you just never know, but I do know he's trying!

Lee's contract job ended on Thursday, with a whimper (no farewell) but that will be fine. He is really looking forward to starting his REAL grown-up job next week. How I envy that! I still love my job, but they have stopped mentioning bringing me on permanently. Oh well, what do I expect?

Parenting Milestone

Today is a big day, the day my first child "leaves the nest." It is the day you think will take forever to arrive when you look at that tiny infant they hand you after the birth. You envision an endless stretch of childhood, and way in the distance a separation. But, here it is. It's today. We will take a few boxes and suitcases up the road a ways and deposit Tuba Boy, whose name is you can see on the cake (I think that's OK since it won't show up in a search) in his dorm at college.

It's been a week of as much fun and bonding with friends as possible for him. Here's the cake he and his girlfriend made earlier this week. It surely appears that he has a healthy self image, anyway! They had fun, and I even got them to clean up the mess they made baking it!

While he and Debate Girl have been spending a lot of time together, he has also been doing a lot with his other friends who are moving on. A great deal of game playing has occurred, for example. Every night this week he has been at one friend or another's house playing mostly board games. Below you see my kids playing D&D again, with three other boys who are not pictured. They do seem to be having a lot of fun.

Kynan also went to a farewell dinner with his debate coach. He picked up some fine things to take with him to college, like coffee cups and coasters, plus a giant clock. I know they will all miss each other as they move on to new and fun things.

He's still a bit of a kid though. He just realized Lee was waiting for HIM to do his own laundry for two weeks. So he can't pack until that is done. He didn't know what button to push on the washing machine to get it started, so I had to do that in the middle of weird and wild work events.

Work, yes, it is weird and wild. I will be glad when I can get back in the office, since all sorts of roofs are being put on houses in the neighborhood. And I will be glad when the next couple of projects are done, because folks are getting testy. I am being up-beat, though, knowing that this job is WAY better than any of the others I've done the past few years. I actually enjoy all the hubbub.

Lee and I had a nice dinner with one of his coworkers last night. I am looking forward to more relaxing stuff like that once work calms down. I had to miss my knitting group on Wednesday because I couldn't stop what I was doing!

Well, only 3 hours until we leave. Whee.

How Do You Spell Relief?

I spell it "Southwestern," because that's the college Tuba Boy got into. That means he at least gets to go somewhere! He even got an academic scholarship award, though it will need supplementing with a needs based award, for sure! Hope he gets some of that, too. We are pleased that he got into a good quality school, and since this is the closest one to where we live, I like it a lot! (The school is in Georgetown Texas.)

I feel like I can relax a bit and wait patiently for the other results to come in, knowing he has a spot.

I am proud of him, too, for getting some academic recognition.

Now we just wait and see what's next. What's next for Beccano is driver's ed, since his "Driver's Ed in a Box" arrived in the mail. Both them boys are going to get some schooling, yep. And both are costly, LOL.

There's still no word on my job future, so I'm hoping something comes up soon!

That's it for me, just a small happy note!

Great Accomplishments, Fun and Such

Wow, this was one busy weekend. But, it was a good kind of busy and it means the next couple of weekends will be a lot less frantic. So, what was going on?

Friday was the last football game of the season, quite emphatically so, as the other team trounced ours quite soundly, so no playoffs. I will really miss the band bus kids, and hope they are all getting along well enough next year to mostly reconvene on the same bus. It was really cute when Attention Hound raised his hand and asked what busy I'd be on next year, and I said, "Whatever bus you all are on," and they mostly seemed to agree to try to be "Bus 4 4 Ever" or something like that. One kid also asked, after I told them they were welcome to come to the wedding, "Who are you getting married to." So, I pointed to Lee, who had been on the bus nearly every time we went anywhere, but I guess was invisible because he didn't say, "Attention band students!" at the top of his lungs like I did. I'm glad I got to know these kids, and am happy I even made a genuine friend out of it!

Saturday was very, very long, but productive. I got up earlier than usual and headed off to Deana's house to pick her up for a long drive. We went to New Braunfels to get my wedding dress alterations taken care of (dang, the alterations cost more than my previous most expensive dress ever). But, it will be pretty. We were rather late because I took the "Seguin" exit and not the "Seguin Ave." exit. Close, but not exactly right. But, we lived and it got taken care of, and managed to eat an early lunch at perhaps the most clueless Dairy Queen ever. I did better finding the next thing, which was the Kid 'n Ewe alpaca, mohair and other fibers festival. I went on and on about it in my knitting blog, so read about it there if you wish. It was a lovely drive, though, and even though it meant no time to work on my sock, it was worth it.

After an equally lovely drive home, I actually had some time to relax and enjoy my yarn before Lee and I went on a genuine date. We saw the group Chanticleer, which is an a capella men's chorus from San Francisco. They are mind-boggling, to put it mildly. Not only are the harmonies perfect, the timing incredible and the songs beautiful, but the voices are unworldly. There are genuine male human beings with vocal ranges higher in the soprano range than anyone in the Live Oak UU Church Choir, that's for sure! It was really nice that Edgar from choir let Lee buy his tickets, since he couldn't make it. We may go to another concert in this series, which is at First Presbyterian Church in Austin. It's a really lovely church, with wood walls and a really nice feeling. All the Jesuses in it are kind looking.

Sunday started off with a bit of a challenge, because XH wanted to be fully briefed on Tuba Boy's college plans, since Tuba Boy had not been very forthcoming on this topic. I foresaw that he would not do the work needed for this, so I went to the websites for the five colleges I decided he's be applying to (well, someone had to decide) and found the links to how to apply as well as to the application forms. I then made a little bulleted list of the main points about applications. So, when we all got together in one big happy family at a coffee shop, Tuba Boy was able, after some prodding, to adequately address his dad's questions. To be honest, the man has every right to ask--it is HIS money that will be paying. So, now everyone is perkier on this topic, I hope. I also will be making sure the boy does not get distracted by his newly improved social life to the extent that he misses his deadlines. Stuff must happen this week.

Once that was out of the way, it was smooth sailing to church, where there was a nice sermon by the Good Young Minister followed by a very fun sale of interesting paper bead jewelry made in Uganda by women there. The organization is Beads for Life. You'd never know the beads were paper unless you were familiar with the process or someone told you. There were some very nice designs. I got some as gifts for my sister and stepmother, and I know they will both like that they go to help people feed their families. The great news is that you can buy some from their website, or host a party--it would be a great women's group activity. The beads are really pretty!

Following that extravaganza of spending, we headed off to Lee's least favorite spot, the mall. There we spent more money. But, it was on pretty wonderful stuff! Lee got new glasses so he can SEE better. The new frames blend well with his hair and are very unobtrusive. Next, we went to the lovely Men's Warehouse and got him a wedding suit. Actually, he got two, cause they were on sale. Certainly was more than the Penneys models we'd originally intended to get, but these are going to be tailored to fit him, just like my wedding dress. We will be recognizable as the people whose clothing fits perfectly, not the bride and groom! He has a beautiful shirt, new dress shoes and a nice gold tie, too. He will look fine, I tell you!

You'd think that shopping would have exhausted us, but no, we were on a roll. We next headed out to a brief, yet yummy, Asian-style lunch and then to Sam's Club and the gigantic Garden Ridge store near work. I wanted to get the odious task of buying serving items, vases for the wedding flowers, and the rose garland to mark off the parts of the labyrinth we are going to walk around OVER with. And we did it. Quite serendipitously, we discovered at Sam's sturdy paper plates in red and white, and dessert plates in a gold and white pattern. Whoa, our colors. So we got massive quantities of the plates, clear cutlery and clear drinking glasses (smaller, to hopefully save on soda/wine consumption). We also found a perfect base for a chalice and a really cool lazy susan thing that will be great for serving appetizer things and for Thanksgiving.

Garden Ridge was more of a challenge, but by the time we were finished, we'd managed to NOT buy bunch of Christmas stuff, yet get lovely gold vases, a red candle holder for the chalice, a blue/gold bowl to hold the water element, a satin thing to cover the altar, nice red napkins, a bunch of red and gold tulle and ribbon for decorating stuff...and stuff like that. In the end, I think we have all the decor items we can get until the last-minute Friday workday purchases (flowers, drinks, etc.) and the Saturday barbecue and such. What a tremendous relief to not have to worry about it all next week. I just need little things like name tags and disposable serving spoons and such.

I have all the speakers at the wedding lined up--Rev. Kathleen and my sister will do readings. And my sister and dad will be "greeters" (telling people where they can set their food down, and where the nametags are). I hope the kids will help with that, too, until just before the ceremony. Parker will cheerfully force people to sign the guest book. Katy will also be there to direct traffic, I hope. I am going to make signs out of our old political ones directing people behind the church for the wedding. That should help, too.

I am exhausted just from describing all this wedding planning. It is a good thing that we had a nice relaxing evening looking at guitar websites with Beccano, chatting with Tuba Boy's visiting friend, and yelling at football on the television. I wasn't up for much else!

Today I have been working on a confusing project, but making progress. And I had a nice lunch at an Indian restaurant with my new contact at the company I technically work for. She said they ARE having writing jobs come through, so not to be in too big of a panic mode. And I am not. Every time this happens my panic period is shorter! And lots of people are in the same boat. I am a little scared--I keep hearing about friends getting laid off or having to lay off staff. It's really a sad time. How come Obama hasn't fixed everything yet, huh? (Insert nervous laughter here--nobody can fix this quickly, Democrat, Republican, Libertarian, superhero or deity.)

College Memories

Someone posted this meme on her blog a while back and I saw it on the Huffington Post. But, feeling nostalgic, as I often do when facing yet another exciting financial challenge (which will open new doors! help me learn new things! present a GREAT opportunity! and other positive mantras), I thought I'd take a whack at this one. And to entertain you, here's a nice photo of Lee.

For background, I was at the University of Florida in my hometown, Gainesville, for four years, then the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign for 7 years until I could take it no more! This is about my time at the 4-year college. Go Gators, though I never watched you play football while I went there.

* What insecurities did you take with you to college? Are you still carrying them or have you set intentions and taken steps to let them go?

I took a huge insecurity about my looks and a worse one that I was not worthy of love. I think I sought out affection so hard during those years that I made some bad decisions. It has taken a long time to get over feeling I was so ugly and unworthy of love that I'd take anyone who looked at me sideways for a partner. Finally I think I have done the right thing and chosen someone because I deserve such a nice, compatible person.

* What expectations did you have going into college and how did they or are they impacting your decisions? Are there any expectations you are still clinging to that are getting in the way of what you want?

I expected that I would finish high school, graduate college in four years, get a Master's in two, and a PhD in two after that. Then I would be a brilliant linguistics professor. Everything went great until after the Master's degree, when I fought hard over the fact that the topics I was stuck on were really not interesting to me, and the politics of academia were more the focus than what I liked, which was teaching young adults. I now still feel bad that I didn't do what I set out to do and never really replaced that career ambition with another one that would get me on the road to financial security and intellectual fulfillment. Having the kids (which I do not regret) sent me on a big old detour into web design and parenting support, which seems to have made me someone no one wants to hire. I am pretty sure I'd be in a different place if I'd managed to keep working, building up to a good position in technical writing/management. But, the kids would have suffered, and they are what is most important anyway. So, some ambivalence here.

* Who were you in college? Did you like who you were and how much of that identity do you carry with you?

I did like who I was in college. I enjoyed the classes so much, really had fun meeting people like me (I was in a small "honors college" kind of thing for the mandatory classes, which means all smart kids and real professors). I really loved learning Japanese and linguistics. I loved hanging around with my boyfriend and our friends. I was a fun person who did all the work and still had time for a little social life. I think I was OK then, other than a few misdeeds.

* What were some of your favorite things about college? What did you least enjoy?

I loved those honors classes, my linguistics classes, the town I lived in and my wonderful friends, which were a mix of smart kids and the gay subculture (thanks to boyfriend's late roommate, the wonderful Bobby).

I liked least the snobby fraternity and sorority people and the focus on football and all the privileges the players got, while us smart kids got very little. I didn't like my grandmother guilting me in to visiting, and my mother being sick.


* If you could tell your college self anything knowing what you know now, what would it be?

You really were not fat. And Corey was the best boyfriend ever. You screwed up.


* If you could go back, would you add another major/minor? If so, what and why? Can you take classes in those fields at the local community college now?

I loved linguistics. I'd like to go back and get a degree in biology of some kind, or neurology (brains). I was so good at science, but didn't think I could do it because I was not good at math.


* What valuable lessons were missing from your college curriculum that you are responsible for teaching yourself?

Budgeting, bill paying, business crap. Fiber arts. I wish I could have taken classes in knitting. I really did study everything I was interested in.

* If there was one person from college that you could reconnect with, who would it be? What's stopping you from reaching out?

Dr. Shenkman. Social studies teacher who really cared about kids. I hope I can be the kind of friend to young people that he was to us in college. Every young adult needs a trustworthy adult to talk to as you navigate all that confusing adult "stuff," all those weird urges you get, and all the challenges that come up. Doc was great for us.

* Imagine yourself at your next big college reunion - what do you want to be telling people about yourself?

I did some good work for a nonprofit organization, I love teaching people to knit and making music. I have learned a lot about people and more about myself. I hope I never stop learning!


* College is often about enriching one's self and meeting other people. What are you doing now to expand your circle? How are you exploring new things?

I meet a lot of new people by teaching knitting. That has been a wonderful way to reach out to all kinds of people. I am also really enjoying the people I meet at the kids' school, both parents and students--I have finally found some parents willing to hang out with someone as nontraditional as me. I get a lot of enrichment by going to the local UU church, too. I hear many new ideas and meet some very weird, funny, interesting and unique folks there. I don't think I will grow old from lack of learning and exploring!