Hey There! Family Update

Hello from me and Lee! It's hard to believe we are so calm and relaxed with a child going off to college in less than a week and a whole lot of meetings and work stuff in the next week. But, there we were this morning, waiting for the church Steering Committee meeting, looking happy. We are, basically, a happy couple. In two weeks Lee's "real" job starts, and at least I am still working full time as a contractor, so we can smile.

Beccano is going OK, too. He did a great job finishing summer school, survived his visit to North Carolina, even if his attitude wasn't ideal, and he did not have anywhere near as bad of a time with his first week of summer band as he thought he would--he didn't want to play vibraphone, but he is coping. That makes us proud of him. How could you have a bad time looking this spiffy? This is him wearing a fun paisley shirt he found at the Goodwill store, and his favorite shiny belt that I think we got at the same place last year. Disco boy!

I am much happier with the family member below (Rose) than I have been in a long time. Why? Because Lee bought us a Roomba (robot vacuum cleaner), and it cleans up all the black hair without me having to do it. She is still a bit itchy, but Benadryl has helped a lot. She is shedding quite a bit less.

This family member, Buddy, seems to be feeling a lot better lately. He had been practically crippled for a while (we think he pulled out a toenail), but I saw him running today. I think the new dog food that Lee got for all of them has helped him lose weight, and he feels better. He is barking a LOT less, even at Tuba Boy, and the Rooma is also getting his hair. Yay.

And finally (at least for pictured members), comes Scrunchy. His hair is growing back in and he has lost a significant amount of weight. And he seems very happy and playful lately. I think all the itching was really making him grumpy. Next he will have to get his teeth cleaned, I guess. I am relieved that all the animals seem at least marginally better.

And while I have no photo of Tuba Boy, he seems ready for college, though we are all rather sad to see him and Debate Girl leave for college. They are so much fun to talk to. And it is so much fun to have the Roommate and Debate King coming over, too. I had so much fun listening to them playing Dungeons and Dragons last night. Debate King at one point asked me if it was "OK if I use the 's" word?" I told him they were all legal adults and they can say any word they want. OK, Beccano was there, but he's heard that word before. I will really miss all the new college kids when they go, but at least I have holidays to look forward to!

Lee's dad is feeling so much better that he got a new tractor (see his blog, in the sidebar, for more on that). And my parents are OK. Things are as good as they have ever been here. I am hoping for improved job news next week, but am just fine with things the way they are there. The folks are still fun, fun fun, and the work is hard. That is just fine!

Let's see what comes next!

GOOD Stuff

See how happy this dog is? That's how everyone feels around our house right now. Even the dogs are feeling better, because the vet told us how much Benadryl to give them to actually help with all their itching issues.



Scrunchy got a clean bill of health at his return check-up, and had already lost two pounds. He is like a new dog. And even Rose and Buddy seem to feel better, though both are still worrying away at certain spots.

So, why are we so happy? Well, if you haven't heard it in person, let me tell you that Lee has accepted an offer of a permanent position at AppleCare (the tech support division of Apple Computers). He will be working with our former boss when we first met, and will have benefits, good pay and all that. The only downside is probably a bit more travel than I would like, but he hopes he won't be doing as much training as some others in that position. Still, he LIKES doing training--this job is doing all things he is good at and enjoys. It's a win-win situation. He was also up for another job, which initially paid better but was less in line with his interests, so it's great that this one panned out.

We are, as you can imagine, thrilled with the prospect of insurance and paid holidays. Perhaps the really long period of worrying about finances and stability will actually be coming to an end, at least for now. In the current economic situation, we consider ourselves incredibly fortunate.

So, what's this a picture of?



Why it's the view out of my office window. What office, you ask? Well, the folks at the slightly wacky contracting gig decided that I ought to come into the office more. And I have been there the last 9 work days. It's made a big difference, though cut into my blogging and knitting time considerably. That's OK, though, because they decided they like me in the office so much that they are going to try to make me permanent. Yep, that's right. If things work out, I might also have a "real" job soon! I'm keeping my fingers crossed, but so far the bosses' boss has said it's OK. I might have to do a wee bit of traveling, but at first it should not be too much.

I have really enjoyed the last couple of weeks in the office. It is honestly a very good bunch of folks to work with. I like everything they ask me to do, and am learning new things as I go along. The office is small, like about ten people, and they are all pretty darned fun and funny. And of course, all very, very intelligent. Scary smart, even. This is just ideal for me.

Plus, as you can see, I am stuck in the "bad" cubicle. Heh heh. The one with a wall of windows looking out onto a bunch of trees. This is NOT bad in my opinion! They've been just great about setting things up for me, and even played a practical joke on me. No complaints whatsoever about any of this. I will keep you posted!

The kids are just fine, and Beccano has finished 2/3 of his summer school. He actually seems to have enjoyed it quite bit. He did a bunch of driver's ed on the computer, too, and just has to get his learner's permit now. Slowy but surely we are making progress.

I have also been doing work on a church committee. Grr. That is less than ideal, but I am doing it well. I feel virtuous for at least trying again. Speaking of church, one of my favorite families is moving to Colorado, so I need to go to that party now. Mary, the mother of the family, was one of the first people to be nice to me and befriend me at the church, so I will miss her, and the rest of them all. I hope they have success and happiness there.

Worried and Hail Pix

Lee got a call this morning from his niece that said his dad was not doing well. Can't get out of bed and is shaking. So Lee ran off to the farm as soon as he could put together some stuff. I hope it is something easy to deal with--we can't miss work, being contractors. It is so hard being far from your elderly parents. Especially stubborn ones who won't TELL you when they need you.

It will be a lonely time here. Yesterday, Tuba Boy set off on his graduation gift trip to Alabama with his debate friends. So, today it's me and Beccano. He will play me some music to entertain me as I continue to mess up my knitting, I guess.

Think of Lee and his dad, please.

I also thought I'd share a few photos from the hail storm from Thursday. The top one is one of the bigger hail stones and this one shows how it really knocked all the leaves off the porch plants and decor items. Hail blew sideways--also there are a lot of dents in the garage doors. Sigh.

Update: Lee's dad made it to the hospital in Cuero and is getting fluids. They are checking to see if there are abdominal issues. I am glad the stubborn fellow let Lee take him in!

Catch-up 4: Graduation

Yay, this should be the final "catch-up" post for today! I am sure the one of you who reads this is having a great day of staring at photos and seeing my descriptions. I am not at my creative peak!

But, the front door says it all. I guess I have reached the initial "goal" of parenthood: I have a child who graduated successfully from high school. I guess Tuba Boy has put down the tuba and is ready to pick up...um...the fancy laptop he got from his dad, I guess! I am very proud of his high school achievements, mostly gained without all that much effort, so I am hoping he kicks it up a notch in the fall. Right now, though, he gets to enjoy himself a bit.

The day started with me doing a bunch of work starting at 6 am, so I'd be sure to get all I needed to do done. Then the kids' dad came to pick me and Beccano up to go to the ceremony, which was in downtown, where we saw Bruce Springsteen. Lee had a bunch of work to do, since graduation was at noon on a Wednesday, and could not afford to lose the hours. So I took a lot of pictures. I was glad that the ex gave us a ride, since there was no real easy parking. We got a spot just fine, though. I'm glad I put on a skirt and top and made Beccano wear a shirt that buttoned, since the ex wore his suit. I think it is nice to treat graduation seriously, though. A lot of people's families did not.

Anyhow, the above is the empty auditorium. Space for LOTS of graduates: over 600.

I'll spare you photos of lines of matching teens marching in, or the cool thing the ROTC did by making living stairs for the flag bearer to climb. Here we have Snow, the saludatorian, delivering his speech. It was a really enjoyable one, very human. Turns out it was his original speech that he was supposed to change around and make more perky. While I felt badly for the nice debate coach who rewrote the speeches for the principal, I do think the kids' originals were fine. I am happy they stuck with their guns. Neither speech was lewd or crude. I mean, for heaven's sake, these were stereotypical brilliant Asian-American kids--they weren't going to incite a riot!
There is only one highlight to graduation that matters to each family, and that is seeing their kid shaking hands and getting the diploma. Here Tuba Boy is doing just that. (Photos I took sometimes were blurred because I used the "night" setting and had to try to hold still.) I can tell that's him, though, shaking hands with Dr. Chavez the superintendent. That guy had to be dead tired after shaking 3000 hands on Wednesday!
Afterwards, we tried to get photos of Tuba Boy in his regalia, but by the time we found him, he was already trying to strip it off. But, we did snag this lovely image of him and Brilliant Girlfriend (look at all the stuff she had to wear on top of her gown--cords, tassels, mantels, awards!). Tuba Boy had a medal for getting an A average and for completing some rigorous set of standards. Go him.
And just one final shot to show that Tuba Boy's parents are very proud of him. His mother wishes she didn't look quite so...rotund. And this is after losing at least ten pounds! Oh well, just look at those lovely kids, with wonderful futures ahead of them.

We had a very late lunch at Chuy's restaurant near our house after the ceremony and a lot of traffic. I know the kids enjoyed a chance to dine with their parents, and the parents survived quite nicely. I guess we are all happy where we are in life and can now enjoy our family, in whatever configuration. Maturity. It shows up eventually, I guess!

That night we enjoyed a really fun party at Future Roommate's house. I had a great time talking to all the kids, and so did Beccano, who got to talk music with some of the "good" older musicians. The seniors tossed water balloons and had all kinds of fun. I'm glad I got to go to a party. And Lee at least got to show up there and give greetings (the kids' dad went home after we ate).

Tuba Boy has been partying ever since, and just driving around and having fun, visiting the school, being with friends. He is really looking forward to his gift from us, which is a trip to Alabama to see his friend Morgan compete at the national debate tournament. If I have already blathered on about this, forgive me. I can't remember what I typed...

Suna, She Gots Issues

Just Some Pansies
Originally uploaded by sunasak

(The reader needing cheery perky stuff may wish to skip this, because below I try to figure out why I had a hard time coping with things that weren’t all THAT bad, really.)

Stress-a-Rama

This weekend we got up extra bright and early and went to a workshop to fill out Tuba Boy’s financial aid forms, without having filled out our tax forms because Lee does them via a guy in south Texas and does not do them early like I always have. Trying to guess all the numbers was an interesting experience. But at least we got the form filled out by the deadline for his first school.

The yarn shop was also more challenging than usual, which led straight into going home at 5 pm and finding out house guests were on the way. Turns out Lee’s family just gets in the car and shows up, unlike mine, who tell you months in advance if they are visiting. It’s just one of those different ways of doing things that frequently occur, but I was sorta ill prepared for this, since Lee’s step-son from the previous marriage had said he was coming a half dozen times before and not made it. I hadn’t even met him until he showed up after our wedding ceremony. I’d gotten ready the previous times when nothing happened, so I got lax and forgot which weekend it even was. (I thought last weekend was Valentine’s weekend, not Son of Lee birthday weekend.) And I had no idea they’d be spending the night (he brought the very well dressed fiancée too), so I had not made sure there were clean sheets and towels, plus there was an immense television on the guest bed. Son of Lee moved it. Now it’s on the old entertainment center that also needs to go somewhere other than the dining room (it seems to be the staging area for extra stuff and I can’t keep it the way I’d like it to be). Back to topic, it was good to meet another person from Lee’s family, of course, and I realize having the room ready, food available for visitors’ breakfasts, and the rooms made livable is not as important to others as it is to me (it’s a woman thing or something like that). As it was, they arrived at 10 pm, talked for two hours, went to sleep, went to church with us and left. I hope it was worth the drive from Houston! At least it was an interesting enough church service, and Lee seemed quite ecstatic about the time together, so it probably was worth it!

Stress Continues

Things didn’t really improve for me after church, though I had a nice time talking to Tuba Boy while waiting for a rehearsal for a church service band. I couldn’t even manage to sing “When the Saints Go Marching In,” a song I certainly know HOW to sing. They, accidentally written words on the wrong parts of the sheet music, so I kept trying to sing the chorus as the band played the verse. I am sure the choir director, who was just hanging out, thought I was nuts because I was having so much trouble on a simple song. At least she realized it when she looked at the music. And poor Tuba Boy had no tuba, so tried to play bass instead. He still has not learned the notes on guitar. That is amusing, since he is so good at reading music on the tuba. So, that was unpleasant and stressful.

Stress Tightens Its Grip

Sunday afternoon we decided to do something fun and different, which was go spend our wedding gift certificate to Ten Thousand Villages, one of those stores that sells fair trade doo-dads from around the world. I was counting my knitting and realized Lee had missed the only useful exit for getting to South Congress, which got us off on the wrong foot. Then it became difficult to find a parking space. And then on the way out, I didn’t look up in time to see that Lee was going straight into a road that was really a very crowded parking lot. It ceased to be fun, though it continued to be different. Suddenly we were in the car with someone we thought had moved out two years ago! Since one of the hardest parts about living with Jeff was when he (invariably) got angry in traffic, poor Beccano and I probably had post traumatic stress kick in, so we tried to just be quiet. We all did live through the journey and even had an OK time at Things Celtic, where I got Beccano a silver necklace that reminded him of his band’s name. I had not intended to get myself anything, but a similar necklace with a moonstone in it, which the owner of the shop had bought in Glastonbury made me feel a lot calmer, so I got it.

Love in the Air

That’s enough of me being grumpy about my weekend. The good news is both boys now have girlfriends. That’s a new one! I’ve always liked Scrabble Queen, the one who’s been hanging around with Tuba Boy a lot recently, and it is weird to see them dating only because they met in first grade. And wow, she is an amazing Scrabble player (we’ve been playing on Facebook, which is loads of fun). I don’t really know Parker’s Friend, who is the object of Beccano’s affection, but she seems just fine and cute, and Parker can vouch for her. The three of them spent Saturday together and it sounds like they, at least, had a great time. I must say having BOTH boys with girlfriends makes me feel old, but I am glad Becanno has started communicating with the opposite sex more.

Uh-Oh, More Self Analysis

I do know why it was so hard for me to get through the weekend, though. For the past week or two I have been even more sensitive to the mental states of other people around me than usual. That’s quite unfortunate timing, since I’ve been running into double and triple whammies of very strong, very scattered states of being. Nearly everyone I spent a lot of time with for the past few days has been overwhelming to me. I put on my bear necklace and it helped some. Even if it’s just psychologically helpful, that’s fine with me! It is no wonder I had more trouble than usual coping with various things—at times I felt like I was in a completely unfamiliar world, where the people around me understood what was going on and I was coming from some other culture and was just clueless as to how things work in the new world. (That’s how I felt when I had that unfortunately inappropriate job last year.) At least in the end I was kind, a good hostess, patient and more patient.

Spring Is Also in the Air!

But, all is not lost. At least time is marching on in a good way, and signs of spring are popping up all over the area. In fact, I looked up at the redbud tree Saturday morning and was really surprised to see some early pinkness. Woo! All the really early plants are saying hello, so I’ve enjoyed the “tulip trees,” some flowering pears, a shrub with very pink blossoms whose name I can never remember, and of course, my pansies. They are leftover from the wedding, but they are looking a lot better now that the really cold snap is over, and when I sit on the new porch, I am delighted by their fragrance. The yellow ones really smell good.

Everybody has a rough weekend occasionally, so I’m not too worried.

One Week to Go!

You know, I thought it would never be today. I had been waiting and waiting to get to the "real" wedding stuff and here it came! Things have just been plain fun the last day or two, especially since the work worries went away.

Last night I sat around with Parker (who had brought over our lovely wedding nametags--if you come to it, please use one!) looking at teen clothing websites, which, as people who don't shop at those often, we both found them quite amusing. Some of the dresses resembled inanimate objects more than clothing, but we did find her something to wear to the wedding that wouldn't turn her into Teen Icicle. Meanwhile, Lee and Beccano set up their new Arkanam Horror game, and Parker joined them in its inaugural run. I got to knit while they did stuff I didn't understand, but it seemed fun.

Today was my final wedding dress fitting. So, OK, you can see what it looks like. One with my shawl and one without it. Lee drove me to New Braunfels, so I could knit, but horror of horrors, I realized I didn't have enough beads. So, after getting the dress, which is very well packed in its hanger, we went to Hobby Lobby in New Braunfels. Wow, it is way more better than the one here. It is all clean and has tons of stuff. I got different beads, and we also got some 90% off fall decor garlands to make the house even more festive than it already is, if possible. The house looks good now.

We went to our favorite ethnic shop, Things Celtic, and Lee got some celtic earrings. Why? Because he went and got his ear pierced this afternoon. He should be able to wear the new earring at the wedding. My dad will LOVE that. He used to pick on High School Boyfriend about his earring and long hair for hours and hours. At least he is good-natured about it.

After a rather rushed lunch, I went to my Wedding Hair Appointment (look! random capitalization!). Robert the Senior Stylist (he even has a Golden Scissors Award!) went crazy with hairdresserly creativity, and carmelized my hair. I think it probably looks really great, but I can't see it because he then turned my hair into a helmet of curls. He rolled it, sprayed it, then dried it for a half hour. I had rocks for hair. But, he floofed it out and there were really nice loose curls. He then proceded to do an "up-do" because apparently that is what people are supposed to do for weddings. We wanted to see if that's what I want. Well. It is actually a beautiful hair style, and wow, he was amazing in putting it together. It just isn't beautiful on ME, as you can see in the photos. I sort of look like one of my aunts in the 60s. In Chattanooga, Tennessee, land of big hair. Or I look like Minnie Pearl, of you know who she was (which is fitting, knowing that I descend from of a proud Hillbilly Comediennes). The style really looked funny when I was wearing my frumpy hand-knit sweater and jeans, but it does look better with the wedding dress, so Lee took some pictures for me. Still, I think a style with perhaps just a bit of the hair up, but with those nice curls, is in the future for me. Robert said he would not be offended if I wanted something else, so it should be OK. He was really sweet and wanted to take pictures on my phone so there would be a record of it. I will have to email him some of the other pictures. I go back next Saturday and he will do his thing again!

I'd promised Pat at the yarn shop I'd show her the hair, so Lee took Beccano to Goodwill and I paraded my hair around. We all agreed that the up-do was better as a concept than a reality. After a nice Starbucks coffee that turned out to be hot chocolate, we came home and had a relaxing family evening of history projects, bead knitting, blogging and college football. It is always good to get a little rest. I will be treasuring any rest I get in the next week. I am sort of glad I am working, because otherwise I'd be cleaning and straightening every single moment!

A Very Distant Relative

Judy Canova Poster
Originally uploaded by sunasak

Here is a fun gift that Corey, my very first significant other (and still among my favorite human beings on earth), sent me a couple of weeks ago. It's a movie poster from 1960 featuring my famous distant relative, Judy Canova (my grandmother's maiden name was Canova, and my mother and sister both use it as a first name). She does bear a family resemblance. I say if you put Tuba Boy in pigtails, that would be him.

And you wonder where I get all that musical talent and hillbilly wit? Now you know. Some ancient Floridian passed that down.

My maternal grandmother would love to tell stories of the "famous" relatives who moved to New York and were in vaudeville, on the radio, and on TV. And you should have heard her squeal every time the 1970s commercial for Shake-n-Bake came on--maybe you remember the little southern child who drawled, "And I helped!"? Anyway, that was the only thing I ever saw Cousin Judy in.

Anyway, what a thrill it was to get this little gift, which will soon hang in the media room, now that it is safely framed. I'm hoping Corey's office is not ruined from the Iowa floods (he's a professor up there, which we always knew he'd be--he's the one who actually did what we both set out to do in high school,while I kept bumbling from relationship to relationship, left academia, and ended up, well, on this personal growth enterprise known as the Life of Suna.) Sigh, Corey was the best writer in our high school. The best writer in our college. And as far as I am concerned, the best writer in the English department at the University of Illinois in the early 80s! And he taught me everything I know about the cinema and Japanese philosophy. And he was the person who most shaped my beliefs and personal philosophy when I was young. So, a present from him means a lot to me. I am glad he's happy and doing work he loves.

Dying to know more about my distant cousin? Here is Judy's wikipedia article.

Dying to know even more? Here is her limb on the Canova Family Tree (produced by my mother's first cousin and "inventor of the Palm Pilot" in family lore, Frank Canova, Jr. AKA Frankie).

Oh, and here's me on the family tree. Sigh, I wish he'd put in a better photo, say one where I am not really fat.

Anyway, I can't determine how Judy, or her daughter that was on the show "Soap" are related to me, but there they are on the family tree. If you look hard enough, you'll even find an LDS relative, and I'm sure his descendants are grateful to cousin Frankie for saving them a lot of work!

Other News?

Nope, not much. Lee has another job lead, so our fingers are once again crossed. Beccano has written a couple of cool songs on the guitar. It's still slightly rainy. That's all good. Thanks for reading.

Advantages of Being at Home

Refurbished Bike
Originally uploaded by sunasak

I am not thrilled to be earning no money, but I am managing to enjoy some aspects of being at home.

1. The best thing is being able to run errands with the kids. For example, I was able to take Beccano's used road bike to a bike shop with him, and get it refurbished so he can ride it this summer (assuming it gets less hot). He had been really upset when the bike didn't work right when he tried to use it, but he feels really good now. We went to a really nice bike shop who did not charge much at all. I am relieved that his dad and stepmother are able to help with this, since our finances are so limited right now. I feel like a "real" mom being able to help him during "work" hours!

2. I was also able to take him around looking for an African drum, which we found at the local music store. It gives him something fun to do while waiting to get work from my friend Bill. He got a "deal," too. It's nice to see him making good choices of what to spend money on!

3. I am also able to get little errands done that have been stagnating when I am gone so much. Beccano and I got his really fancy Radiohead poster framed, as well as Tuba Boy's portrait from his band trip last spring. It looks really good in a nice frame, as you can see. I am so glad Michael's has frames on sale almost all the time! We're putting the picture in the media room, even though it may not be the best one ever. It's still funny.

4. Today we are going to the inexpensive box store to get Tuba Boy very, very cheap pants to wear at work, since he gets bleach all over his work pants. I had been wanting to do this for quite a while. It's nice to have some time.

5. Lots of knitting. Even messed up knitting (had to erase a lot on my shawl last night, which will be detailed on the knitting blog.

6. Next week I can help get Tuba Boy's car repaired. Doing stuff like that while working so far away and taking the bus was practically impossible. The car really needs fixing, and I am relieved that, again, the kids' dad and stepmother are helping out. It is pleasant working the stuff out with her. That is so good!

Other Stuff

I have had no job action all week. I hope, hope, hope that changes next week.

I am sending healing thoughts to my old friend who had some scary surgery. Even if we won't ever get to talk again, I still care about the whole family. And I am sending healing thoughts to my church friend who also had some unexpected surgery complications.

Just an update

I was waiting until I had a photo to share of the flower bed edging Lee is putting around the house, but it keeps being rainy or something, so I don't have any.

Mostly I wanted anyone who was worrying along with me to know I met with the boss yesterday and got much better feedback on me and my work, so I get to stay in the office. I guess it helps that the super-competent next-newest person just got a different position at the university, so if they canned me they'd be down 2 out of 3 people in our sub group. Gee, that's great job security (sarcasm off). No, really, things are going much better at work. There is now some laughter and it is a bit calmer, even with the person who likes me least back from vacation and the one that likes me most on vacation this week. I feel like I will be able to handle things from here on out, and will concentrate on working to make things stable at home, helping Lee get another position, etc.

In semi-good news, the stress has helped me in my weight loss plan, and I am only two pounds above the upper limit I usually like to keep to. So if I lose about 7 more pounds, I will be real happy. My clothing is back to fitting normally, too, though the new jeans I bought a month or two ago are now really too large. Oh, what torture, hee hee.

Other good stuff. Beccano's guitar playing is really, really improving. He sounds very musical, and I am very impressed with his practicing and work ethic on that. And Tuba Boy has stepped back a little from the silent surliness and has been pleasant to be around for a few days. Something like his old cheery self. He's messing up the car a bit, but handling it OK. I have been helping him with some school registration challenges, and it was SO nice to get a call from him just wanting some support. I feel useful as a parent again.

So, things are not too bad. At least I am in still love and someone wants to move my wedding date earlier. Aww.

She Started It!

My Maternal Grandmother
Originally uploaded by sunasak

Lenten Ventin': Sometimes I wish that people with child-related issues would not try to raise children anyway. They treat their children oddly, which then causes them to have emotional issues, which they then pass on to their children. My grandmother, the lovely twin who viewed herself as "not good enough" because her sister, 20 minutes younger, was "the baby" and got all the good presents, preferential treatment and such, started a trend in my maternal line (or probably continued something: all but maybe one of her siblings had some pertty strong mental illness symptoms). My grandmother resented her sister her whole life. Then she married a Swede who showed up on a white horse and had a baby, who apparently was quite the wonder baby, until he died around age 2, in his sleep. This did not help matters. She began her history of "nervous breakdowns" at this point. A few years later, she had a daughter, my mother, who was endlessly compared to her dead sibling and found wanting. Her brother would have been smarter, he would have been athletic, he would never have "talked back." My poor mother was treated pretty horribly by my grandmother--some sounds pretty abusive (the grandfather was apparently quite nice, but worked a lot).

Fast forward to my mother trying to escape this family by running off and marrying a dashing alcoholic/drug addict (in the 40s!) after her beloved died in Pearl Harbor (starting HER on her "nervous breakdown" history). She gave birth to my sister, then fled the abusive fellow and went back to live with her parents. So my sister was raised by two women who were constantly told they were not "good enough." She was raised as the Golden Darling of Perfection, which was hard to live up to, since she wasn't a great student and had other normal human elements. She quickly learned to kiss up to her two maternal figures, to survive.

Well, eventually, my mother met my dad and they got married. Due to me coming along. My sister tried to move in with them, but the grandmother had a "nervous breakdown" and she had to go back. I showed up, and was not blonde, thin or doe eyed. I didn't kiss up either. So, I was endlessly found lacking in comparison to my beautiful half sister. I compensated by trying to be smart and not screw up. So, to this day I am really hard on myself if I mess up, don't get the job, disappoint someone, or otherwise exhibit a flaw. Which of course I have plenty of.

So my vent is that I really wonder if my mom and grandmother ought to have raised kids, seeing how they came from a long line of people who compare children and TELL them they find them lacking. (My sister, of course, feels lacking in comparison to me, and my brother's jealousy is pathological.)

Right now I am dealing with having kids who don't have self esteem issues, so are just fine not over-achieving. I love that I seem to have broken the cycle, but dang, it's so hard to watch them not try to be the valedictorian! However, I can see that by being the best person they can be, they will grow up much more well balanced than their mom.

And their mom is a real mess right now. All the job and money stress is taking me farther than I can cope with. And now Tuba Boy's car has broken (I think he may have hit a bump too quickly that broke a clutch cable). I had hoped the car would not IMMEDIATELY become a money pit. And I am having trouble helping the kids, doing what Lee would like, and fulfillling other obligations without disappointing one or more people. Trying to get all the things done that needed done yesterday was quite a challenge, and it still ended up awful, even though I did my part and was everywhere I was supposed to be.

Job Seeking: I applied for some more jobs yesterday, did a phone interview with ALE, and talked to a couple more people. Tomorrow is the big university job interview. Of course, campus will be crazy due to the Presidential Debate later in the afternoon.

Family Update

I figure I owe a family update, so here are some random news tidbits.

First, I am so sick of our barking dogs that I could scream. Every single thing that makes a noise sets Gwynneth off, then Scrunchy begins this awful small dog sound that really resembles coughing up his internal organs. Gwynn seems to have hurt herself, or gotten hurt pestering Buddy. She is limping again. I do not blame Buddy. When she gets all agitated she bounces around and barks in his face.

Tuba Boy has a new car. Sorta. There is a car in our driveway that looks very much like the one in this picture, but it still belongs to his dad, because he didn't buy it until just before he left, so the title has not been sent to him yet. There was no way to sign it over to me. So, I can't insure it. So, Tuba Boy's new car gets to sit in the driveway. But isn't it a nice car? I think it was a good choice, and is certainly in good shape for a 1995 Swedish people mover. The back seat will certainly hold a tuba. It drives pretty well, but sure requires some clutch and steering effort. I like it, though--it drives the way I like and is very comfortable. I think, once we get the title, change over the registration, and get his license renewed (also a pain in the butt thanks to needing a form from school, even to renew the darned thing), he will enjoy it. He has turned into a pretty good driver.

And here is Beccano's new toy. His dad got it for him as a late Christmas gift (because the original plan didn't work out--I ended up just buying the Rock Band software). Yesterday, when the kids were off from school, Beccano spent a lot of time making this thing do all sorts of tricks. He was very patient in figuring out what to do to complete the circuits to light up lights, sound buzzers, and such. I can see that lots of learning will happen with this little electronics lab, so I am glad he picked it. I really enjoy listening to his thought processes as he plays with it, too. He's also been playing a lot of guitar (got a blister from it!) and making much progress on the fine songs of Radiohead, which I don't know, so I have no idea if he's doing well or not. But he is learning to finger pick!

Beccano got a very interesting book called Dead Children Playing, which contains art from the people who do Radiohead's album art. It is really interesting, and I am intrigued by his choice of favorite artist. There's a lot to discuss in this very dark art. I love the techniques and ideas, especially the series of words seen on signs around various cities.

Lee is improving rapidly and I am so glad that the pneumonia is fading away. He is working normally and able to do a little around the house. I don't want him to push it, though, since his lungs are not healed yet, I am sure.

As for me, I am not feeling too well--seeing how bad the economy is going, and losing that ALE job because they have once again stopped hiring folks like me--that doesn't help. I've had a few friends with sad deaths in their families or scary illnesses, and that concerns me, too. I didn't get the usual optimism from thinking about people like MLK yesterday, either. I just feel bad that all his wonderful ideas are expressed so rarely any more. War, not peace, is what people seem to want. And hate, not love for people who differ from you is the norm. Not enough of us are saying aloud, "I don't like this!" because we are afraid of the consequences. Hope for the future? I do not see much.

So, love your families. I love mine. One happy note: my dad plans to visit. He hasn't been here in years.

Busy Weekend!

This will be what they call an "image intensive" post, because I saw some interesting things that I wanted to share! There are even more on my Flickr pages, if you are into rural Texas historical sites or something.

First, best wishes to Tina and Jared, who had a fun wedding on Saturday evening, even after they didn't come to our house Friday and have a rehearsal like they said they would. Of course, any excuse to clean up the accumulated clutter is good, and I am still enjoying the way the downstairs of our house looks.

Saturday morning I taught a mother/daughter pair crochet, which was a fun change from knitting. None of my knitting pals showed up, so I headed home fairly soon after answering the rest of the people's questions who needed help--it was a sale day, so I helped with the question-answering so the workers could help people buy yarn!

After getting duded up, it was off to LOUU for the Chemical Pink wedding extravaganza. We took some pictures at the wedding, but used those disposable cameras, and need to get them developed (and share them with the couple), but here's one the minister's husband took. We enjoyed spending some time with our tarot buddies Shannon and Royce, who brought the spousal unit I had yet to meet along with them. Bill did sound at the wedding, plus Rev. Kathleen's husband, Jon M. was there, so we had people to talk to other than the wedding party's relatives. The most fun part of the wedding was the wedding march, which was the Darth Vader theme from Star Wars. Only in this setting was that not unexpected. Both kids did clean up well, though, and they put together a really nice ceremony. It just took a while for it to happen. More time for me and Shannon to catch up, though! Our kids were really good, and Beccano blended right in with his Western jacket on. I wore my extra-organge dress with big purple pansies on it, along with the classy orange-ish dress shoes Pilar got for me last year, so I was Ms. Classy, I am so sure. Anyway, that was the beginning of our busy time.

We woke up long before the kids and headed to the rural breadbasket of Texas to give Lee's dad his Christmas gifts. Oh, did he love his socks! I was so happy to see his eyes light up, and to see the joy on his face when he tried them on and they fit! He is looking a lot healthier, too, and that was another good thing to see.

Once we got all presented up, we went to lunch in Yorktown. The top picture depicts where we ate, Aunt Di's Kountry Kitchen (apparently rural people all spell that way, ha ha). It's got a big dance floor and stage, too--I wish I could be there to listen to music some night. Lots of people are there on Sundays, and they all seem to know each other, naturally. What impresses me is the food is pretty good. I had turkey and dressing, and the dressing came out better than mine did this year, plus the mashed potatoes were divine. The turkey was REAL.

After lunch, I asked if we could drive around and see some of the things I hadn't seen in the area yet. This also made Lee's dad happy. We went to see the area where he grew up, and all the little towns that are still there, sorta, or used to be there. That's what the next bunch of pictures are of. The little white house looking building above was the general store/bar/restaurant or whatever in "Cottonpatch" (which used to be called something else) and was right across from the school Ernest Lee Sr. used to attend as a child. That's where they got penny candy after school. The school is no longer standing, though we did get a picture of the site where it was. He went there until high school, in a 3-room school, one room of which was reserved for the "Mexicans," who were segregated. There weren't any black people. Still aren't. Just Germans, Czechs, Poles and Mexicans.
The building that is larger and white says "Garfield" on it, and is the rural hall, where dances and such used to be held. They still have events there today, like turkey shoots and barbecues and all that. It's where the rural people went for fun when they didn't go into the big towns. At left is one of the "big towns," which is where the family used to hang out in the 20s and 30s, Nordheim. Now there is not much there at all, and few if any of the storefronts are used (there is a bank down the street, though, and it appears they are restoring the old bank building, that says "911" on it, because its 1 got lost). I like how they still have a Christmas decoration. The school (newer one) is still going, so there are still families around. Yorktown, on the other side of Lee's dad's farm, kept going and is more of a viable community still. It's rundown, but things are open, there are places to eat, gas stations. churches and such.

We came back to Lee's dad's place and watched football for a while, then I asked if we could go for a walk. That was the most fun part! We walked way to the back of the farm property, to parts I had not seen yet. At the back, there are trees, a pond and some old buildings, and a really nice view of a valley and some lovely woods that I didn't know was there.

Here you see Lee as a man outstanding in his field. Yes, that is his field. The sun was setting, so the light on all these pictures is interesting. The field has been mown for hay. We enjoyed listening to all sorts of sounds as we walked, and also ran into some neighbors who were sitting in their deer blind, pretending to hunt, but mostly looking at cool things, like the family of wild hogs that was walking around, and the five huge bucks in the next farm, way out of shooting range (whew). The man was mostly entertaining his disabled son. That was nice.
On our way back to the house, both Lee and I kept looking at a telephone pole, not wanting to ask the other if we saw what we thought we saw. We were right, it was not a transformer--it was an owl! You could see its pointy "ear" feathers when we got closer, and it bobbled its head up and down a few times for us. Pretty cool. I have to admit I had never seen an owl sitting still before--just the ones that have flown in front of me three times in the neighborhood at home.

One more picture of the farm to share, and I like this one a lot. It's the pond, which Lee's dad says he'd like to make into a 14-acre lake by building a dam. I don't think that will happen any day soon. It would be so beautiful to build a house on the hill next to the pond, where there are some big old trees, which are next to that beautiful view of the less intensively farmed parts of people's properties. Of course, getting utilities and the road back there would be "fun." But, it's a nice dream. We have lots of dreams of what we would do if the oil company found a bunch of natural gas on the property in February, ha ha. But, that is a slight hope, at best (better than none--they wouldn't look for stuff if there weren't a chance, I guess!).

The scary part of the evening came right after the sun set, when I looked out and saw something orange on the horizon. It turned out to be a HUGE fire off in the distance, and it grew and grew as we watched. A secondary one started, then they merged. We were a little concerned, but decided it would not make it to the farm. On our way home, we drove the long way, to be sure that the fire was as far away as we thought it was. It really was scary and big, though. I hope no one was hurt and that it got under control. There's a burn ban, and it is the traditional time for fireworks, which is worrisome.

Anyway, since we went home the long way, we drove through Cuero. There, Lee surprised me with a trip through their lovely Christmas light display. This is just one teeny photo from the display (hard to photograph at night from a truck). Many, many people and groups donated money and time to make a really fun display that you drive through. I guess it's a smaller version of the Austin Trail of Lights. Very well done, though, and a good ending to our tour of rural Texas at Christmastime.

Which reminds me, we did see a couple of cute rural holiday displays. One was three tires, big, medium and small, stacked on top of each other and spray painted gold, covered with lights. It made a really quirky "Christmas Tree." The other was 5 round hay bales stacked 3, 2, 1, spray-painted green, with lights and ornaments. Another great "tree"! I am glad we got to go on this trip, and wish the kids could have come. Beccano would have loved the owl and to hear the coyotes barking at night. But, they needed a rest, and Lee and I enjoyed our time together.

We hope to have a nice New Year at Janet's house (trying to get back into old traditions, but with better habits) followed by yummy food. Lee already made ham salad, so the yummy has begun!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Reminding Myself

Holiday Boyz
Originally uploaded by sunasak

Just reminding myself that there's always something to cheer me up at home. Look at these shaggy fellows, dressed as dark as they can get, with hair as long as they can manage. This is their "formal" attire for their band concert last week. Beccano DID tuck the shirt in for the concert.

They remind me that there's always some amusing conversation to be had, music to hear, or website to share with these guys and Lee around. So even when the job search gets me down (as it is today, as it did yesterday, as it will tomorrow at the rate things are going) or when the stress on me and Lee makes both of us less than fun to live with, we have goodness and abundance. If I type this enough, I will do a better job remembering it, I hope!

Friends are having so much trouble, too. I am sending out a lot of energy to people with relationship issues, illnesses, weird family stuff, and work issues (either too much or too little).

Back to withdrawing into myself, which was today's goal. Trying to gather strength to rehearse with the Trey Bone guys tonight. Haven't done that in a while.

Guitars! Whee, That Was FUN!

Rock On, Tuba Boy
Originally uploaded by sunasak

I'm hikacking an email I sent to a list so I hope this post comes out making sense:

We had SO much fun last night, just out of a fluke. I was looking on craigslist for something else and decided to see if there were any cheap banjos for sale (Beccanois interested in learning to play that, but luckily his stepmom may give him hers). I saw an ad for a whole bunch of guitars in a garage. Sounded suspicious, but I sent it on to Lee. We checked it out, and it turns out to be legit--a dude had started an online guitar store, sorta on the lines of Dell, which did OK but his business partner pulled out and he had to close up shop. He still has a bunch of brand-new guitars in his garage, and since he is moving, he needs to get them out.

So, they were bargain guitars, all with the same brand name. All Korean made in the same factories the brand name ones are made in.

We all drove over there and had a blast looking at things. (Also enjoyed the man's very nice wife and daughter and charming guinea pig.) I consulted on a kitchen re-do with the wife while the guys looked at guitars.

There was a wide variety of quality of parts, so I was glad Lee was there to evaluate. Some were definitely "starter" guitars, while there were also fairly nice ones. So, not "great" guitars, but "good" ones. The kids were pretty funny--trying to be cool and not act all excited.

But, when Tuba Boy saw this fretless bass, he just stopped looking at everything else. Turns out he doesn't like frets, and this was his dream guitar (even though it is not a fancy-schmancy one). All the guitars were at wholesale (some below) so it the fretless bass was hardly anything. Tuba Boy is in love.

Lee got a black dreadnaught acoustic for $100. It sounded surprisingly good--just wasn't one of the ones with fancy decorations and inlay. Perfect for outdoor gigs in the middle of winter (which we have one of, 3M Marathon again).

Beccano looked and looked, and tried a very nice one, which he could have had in green (with fingerprint dust on it--it had been stolen from the warehouse and returned! would have been a cool story). But, in his heart, he wanted one that looked "cool" --he was more interested in looks than feel. It cracked the guitar guy up when Beccano asked wistfully if he had something "pointy." (Since guitar man also has a kid, so he apparently understood.) He went in the other room and dragged out a satin-finish yet slightly shiny silver "pointy" guitar (if you are a guitar person, it is a BC Rich Mockingbird style--very retro rock). He said it was the last one he had of that style and he would be happy to just get rid of it. He GAVE it to Beccano. It is very basic but actually plays just fine, and Bec is thrilled. Here's what it looks like, only it has cloud shaped inlays, really pretty. There is a picture on Flickr of Beccano making a horrid "rock-out" face with it--click the Tuba Boy photo link and you will see the measley pix I took--none of Lee' so far.

The only guitar that actually cost us anything was the one Lee got for himself, which was one of the good ones hiding in the back of the garage. It's one weird looking thing, black with gold sparkles and lots of gold knobs and a great deal of quite attractive inlay, but it played great. I have found similar ones online for $1500 (or more) and he paid way, way less for it. It is like a fancier pimped-out version of this one. It was made in the same factory as the Gretsch guitars, according to the guitar man (who knows if this is true).

OK enough about guitars. I don't know ihow many of you play, but I have to say it was fun looking at them. But you know what was more fun? That Tuba Boy came home, said, "Can I bring the bass amp downstairs?" then got out his "learn bass" book and CD and sat there until I am sure his butt fell asleep. By the end of the evening, "Smoke on the Water" was wafting up. He really "gets" it (helps he reads bass cleff so well, being a tuba player, and that tuba and bass parts are similar). He'd been messing with Lee's bass, and had it leaning against a door. But the second thing he did was ask Lee for a stand for his new one. He loves it.

Beccano did homework like a speed demon when we got home, then sat patiently with his Wolf Mother songbook and plunked out song after song (no clue how well, not knowing my Wolf Mother catalogue very well.

Lee was just BEAMING at how happy he made the kids. I am beaming at how happy they all are. I love hearing the music (ask me if I still do in a month or two).

Idea!

One more thing: when I typed in the subject line, I wrote "guitarts" instead of guitar. Hee hee--wouldn't that make a great Girl Band name???

Building Up with Words

Blogging leads you down interesting roads sometimes. I am glad I read all the blogs I do, because sometimes I hit on something very helpful. Lately one of my online friends from the past has posted some really helpful stuff about her life that has helped me. Today she responded beautifully to an idea from yet another person's blog, and it was very inspiring!

The idea is to publicly lift your partner up with words, because sometimes it is so easy to zing them, especially if you are an especially verbal person (who, me?). This is an issue I have worked hard on, and I know my sarcasm and passive aggressive barbs have gone way, way down from the way they were in the past (assisted greatly by four years of witnessing the effects of someone who has great difficulty checking his instincts to put others down). But, once a zinger-inflicter, always one. And that is never good, especially when one has a partner who is especially sensitive to such things, like I do. I am sure he could use a public tribute!

So, here is my contribution:

Lee, we have been through a particularly trying few weeks, and neither of us has been at our peak of perfection. I am not sure if I have been good about pointing out all the things that you have been doing that I appreciate and admire, and that maybe I have focused too much on little irritations, due to my, err, irritability. But I do notice that you take care of so many things around the house--laundry, groceries, dinners, dog feeding the dishwasher. Without fail or complaint. I notice how hard you work to make things good in our environment! And I notice how hard you work to be there for the children, too--they notice as well.

Hey, if something doesn't come out perfectly, it is always very obvious from your caring and kind words and demeanor that you had the best of intentions--you never purposely set out to irritate or upset any of us. You want the very best for me and want to protect me and keep me happy. This is such a wonderful gift, and I really appreciate it. Your desire to be a real part of our family is very obvious, and it makes me feel so much more secure and at home than I have felt in decades. You could make a lot of gaffes and still not come close to balancing out the wonderful fact that you truly want to be my partner and aren't going to go away. Sharing your love and kindness has been so healing for me, and given me hope for a happy future with someone to share life with. Thank you for all of this. Know that you have my love and admiration, and it won't stop. You are not a good guy; you are a GREAT guy--the best choice possible for me. I am so glad we found each other!

Isn't it nice that reading other people's blogs can inspire you to be good to others? I enjoyed reading what other women said about their husbands, boyfriends and fiances, as well as what at least one husband said in return. We need more kind words in this world, so I am happy to contribute mine.

Fun Is Where You Make It

A Successful Prank!
Originally uploaded by sunasak

I think I mentioned that we tee-pee-ed the boss's office earlier this week. This is all its glory (since the toilet paper effectively eliminates any way to tell where the heck this is as well as the poor woman's face, I figure it's OK to post). I had the most fun strangling her Elvis Presley figure and hanging him from the blinds. He's fine now, btw. She left it up all day yesterday, and even showed her boss, who was visiting. I have got to say that the department across from mine sure has a lot of fun. They also work hard. That is perfect.

It hasn't been all that fun at our house, but we are trying to make fun as well. I completely lost it yesterday, though, when I got a phone call from Beccano's English teacher saying he was failing English due to not doing his homework. NOT that AGAIN! To his credit he had already approached her himself, looking for ways to remedy things. And he has already remedied math issues. But, on top of Lee's job situation, the massive bills, the drama of Lee selling his old house (it was sad for him--lots of work had gone into it by both him and the ex), the school bus thing (still no apology from the intolerant woman and I have to ride the bus today)...anyway, this incident was the last straw.

I cried at my desk, but thankfully no one was there at the time (lunch combined with the guy across from me having a crown done). Then I cried at Bill when he called wanting to go to lunch. Then I cried at Lee. I got it all back together, but developed a massive headache and sore muscles from being so tense. Thank goodness I had a nice juicy task to do, which kept my mind occupied.

By the time I got home, having managed to do an errand for Lee, avoid an accident two cars ahead of me, and not run out of gas, I was dead. Luckily Beccano agreed to all the things I wanted him to do until he got back under control, and we had a fairly nice time doing homework. I managed to help with Algebra 1, too. It is still hard, but I gave him some tips that seemed to help. All this teaching experience comes in handy at home!

We were supposed to have a committee meeting for the church coffeehouse, but once again, no one showed. So, that looks like we will have one more concert and put it all on hiatus or call it quits. Yay, one more web site I won't have to do any more. I used to really love this coffeehouse, and will be sorry to see it go, but if no one wants to work on it...I guess my friend who booked all the acts will be able to just book them into house concerts at his newly renovated house from now on, so he will still get to be a mover and shaker on the folk scene. Good for him. We need venues for quality folk music up in north Austin still!

So, lots of endings these days. But, Lee and I have our new beginning to focus on, Lee has a new job beginning to hope for, and the kids are still happy...even with all the new homework rules for Beccano. Could be worse. At least no one has tee-pee-ed the house. So far.

Tonight, ugh, long bus ride to Belton for a game, then tomorrow we will drive right back up there for Beccano's percussion section competition right where the game was. Lee will get to come to that, anyway. So will the kids' dad and Tuba Boy, so it should be quite the family event. We will make it fun, in keeping with this entry's theme. I hope we can get up there fairly early and see some of the other competitors. Then, sigh, back to old house or new house work.

Update, the World

Texas Sage at Dawn
Originally uploaded by sunasak

In updates, no word from the band director last night, so I guess we really aren't wanted on the bus. Oh well, that is sad, but we can now leave early if we want and won't have to swelter at any point.

UPDATE to Update: OK, the band director just called and apologized and said all my points were reasonable and right. They are going to work on handling things differently, and we are welcome on the bus. (That will depend on if I feel like going, but I will try.) I think the deal is that I will wait to see exactly how well the parent who instigated the campaign against Lee on the bus grovels. Because I am most displeased with her behavior. She apparently asked about people bringing casual boyfriends on the bus, and when the director said no to that (thinking she was referring to something else entirely), she interpreted it as the legal guardian issue and immediately had my friend email me that Lee was not welcome. Hmph, wouldn't even direct her intolerance at me personally. The band director is a nice man. But there sure are some communication issues among the parents.

Back to the story...

Lee has some good job prospects, and almost had a shot at doing my old job at ALE, but he hadn't been gone long enough. Think good thoughts next week when he interviews for jobs with benefits!

Jeff's mother's health is slowly improving. And we saw him last night at Artz playing with old friends Danny Santos, Steve Brooks and Gerry Burns. The latest incarnation of Bluegrass Vatos, I guess. Beccano and Lee seemed to enjoy it a lot. I mainly enjoyed the updates on Steve and Danny, whom I hadn't talked to in a while. The band wasn't so hot (I missed Jeff's harmonies and guitar on Danny's songs).

The kids are going to go over to Singing Partner Bill and Carolyn's tomorrow to help Bill work on his New Fence Project (they built a huge road where the edge of his yard USED to be, long story). Tuba Boy is still earning points from the text message fiasco. Beccano just likes to smash rocks and get money. I am glad it's a home football game tonight so they will not get home too late.

The World

I have been thinking a lot about how there is so much hate, intolerance and sadness in the world. Having a wee bit of intolerance aimed my way didn't help, but I am also thinking about people in other places.

On NPR this week they had an audio diary of a young dentist in Iraq. I am glad they did this, because hearing a real person's voice makes things far away seem a lot more real and immediate. To hear his happiness when his team won a soccer championship, his fear when he talked about how people in his profession are targets, his ambivalence at perhaps leaving for safety but then losing contact with his family and friends...and then his tears and sadness when his best friend is kidnapped, tortured and beheaded...this really helps you remember that the VAST majority of people in all the war-torn, conflict-filled places are just folks like yourself. They just got born in the wrong place at the wrong time.

How can people treat each other the way the Iraqi factions do? The Palestinians and Israelis? The Pakistani factions? US gangs? (The list goes on...) I think it all boils down to fear. I really and truly believe that many, if not most, of the people doing the kidnapping, shooting, raping, bombing and all that do it from fear. They fear that if they don't hurt others, they'll get hurt. If they don't follow orders, the people in charge will come after their own families and friends. If they question authority, they won't get a chance to ask another question, ever.

I know we will probably never get to the Peaceful World Suna Envisions, just like a candidate with my political beliefs would never get elected. There is good and bad out there and always will be. But I sure wish there were some way that just the people wanting the power and the glory (the ambitious??--see Friday's feast) would be the one involved in conflicts. The ones putting their lives and agendas on the line. So that people who want to live and get along with their neighbors, even those with different beliefs, could just live their lives, raise their families and live without fear.

A lot of the time I am feeling sad for people who are just in the wrong place at the wrong time. I never forget that not much at all differentiates them from me. Not much at all.

Enjoy the photo of the plant in front of our house, taken at dawn this morning.

Nice Family Weekend

High School Football--Band Perspective
Originally uploaded by sunasak

You can see what we did Friday night--what thousands of Texas families did: traveled somewhere to see their children participate in the great Texas high school football ritual. Beccano and I rode an unairconditioned school bus to Temple, over an hour away (takes even longer in a bus convoy). Tuba Boy was on a better bus, while Lee got a ride up, but suffered with me on the bus home.

But, I love chaperoning the kids, and I love sitting with the band and enjoying the pageantry and fun. The sousaphone section made the lovely "Go Mavz" (that's teen talk for "Mavericks") out of water bottles, and we let it stay until the end, when they very kindly cleaned it up and put it all in garbage bags, without being asked to. It was Beccano's first game as a band member, and you can see that he was having a blast, though not working on his posture.

And we won against a team we were predicted to lose badly to, even after 5 interceptions in the first period. My favorite player, a very enthusiastic and fast kid named Aaron Williams, ended up playing on defense, offense and special teams (he took over as QB for a while) until a late hit on his amazing touchdown run hurt him. After that he "only" played defense. Both teams actually played with impressive energy, especially since it was pretty darned hot. Neither team ever gave up, and they mostly had really good sportsmanship. So, we had a lot of fun.

I must say our band was better, even though our show is a bit weird. Nightmares is an odd theme for a marching presentation.

The boys cheerfully helped Lee move more stuff out of his old house on Saturday, leaving me lots of fun yarn store time.

Sunday we survived singing a rather atonal round, livened up by recorder solos, then had a family photo taken for the church directory and a rehearsal for Tuba Boy, who is playing (duh) tuba in some patriotic medley later this month. I'll share a photo of that later.

Lee worked his buns off straightening up the garage and organizing all the stuff he's brought in, though we did a bit of football watching in the evenings. Our house is eventually going to be really nice, if we can just fit everything in.

Keep your fingers crossed for Lee's job possibilities, please. We hope to hear stuff this week. And I hope it is good stuff.

All Together Now

UNT Dorm
Originally uploaded by sunasak.

Woo hoo, Tuba Boy is home and our little family-like unit is reunited at last. The photo is of the dorm he stayed at, in Denton at the University of North Texas. Most of its buildings are this yellow brick stuff. It was a pretty nice looking campus, and bigger than I expected (I learned recently that is is NOT a small school, from my friend whose son is president of the junior class).

Apparently he had a great time, even when they had to go to all their classes in that horrible rain Texas had a few weeks ago. He made some friends and apparently is now the world's expert on Jacques Derrida and Michel Foucoult (will look up that spelling). He sounds like my high school boyfriend, and will lecture on schools of philosophy at the drop of a hat. Well, this makes me a happy human. It is wonderful to see him so excited about something that is not a video game. And something I also like!

Probably the most touching thing that happened when we went to get him on Saturday was that, the second we got in the car, he said, "OK, we have to go to this cool store, now!" And he led us in a meandering fashion (walking somwhere looks different from driving, he realized) to the head shop on the edge of campus. Mmm, incense. Apparently he and his friends had wonderful times going through those hilarious liberal bumper stickers and buttons they have in those places, and looking at all the statues of Indian deities, etc. It was just so sweet that he HAD to show us this place, because he KNEW we'd love it. We had a nice talk with the guy there, who said he knew these were debate kids the way they flocked to the slogans. And he said, "Your son was very well behaved," which was sweet. We got ourselves a few souveniers, which will be a nice way to remember the debate camp experience.

After all the fun in Denton, we took advantage of being in far north Texas to visit Lee's niece, the one whose wedding we went to on New Year's Eve. They live in a mobile home family compound outside of Ponder. And she has a lot of lovely peacocks wandering around. She said they just showed up, and now they stay there. The picture is of one of the daddy peacocks. We had a good visit, and the cigarette smell didn't kill us or anything. She has no kids of her own, but has four at her house this summer, two attached to her husband and two I think that are actually her cousin's children (Lee's family is hard to keep track of) whose parents are unable to care for them. We really enjoyed a couple of the boys, very cute. It was nice to watch Lee play with them. He reminded me of my dad, how he just thoroughly enjoyed playing with little kids. I was never good at "playing" (I talk to kids, but don't goof off much), so I enjoyed watching Lee.

My boys went outside with the oldest kid (very nice, articulate little fellow who's had a hard life but seems to have a good personality all in all) and picked up a bunch of peacock feathers. I know what I would like to do with them, but am worried the dogs will get into them, so alternative ideas are percolating up. They didn't get attacked by snakes or anything, so all was well.

I know Lee appreciated the chance to see his favorite relative, and since she is not feeling well, I know she enjoyed a chance to see him. It's good to get to know the family members, too.

The rest of the trip I knitted and knitted. I have really enjoyed all the car trips, because it's the only time I really get to knit a long time. I finished one pair of socks, and by the end of last night, was over halfway with another one!

Yesterday I just faded away. We made it to church, where there was a cool labyrinth laid out temporarily as part of a worldwide observance. Then I went home and spent the rest of the day napping or knitting and watching QVC (didn't buy anything, even though there was a lot of jewelry to chose from!). The men-folk went to the Harry Potter movie, but I stayed home. I needed a "me" day, and some recharging time. It was great.

I am just plain glad to have the boys both home and no pressing issues. That feels good. A real respite from issue after issue.