- unable to get to sleep (never a problem before in my life)
- eyes watering constantly
- right eye has had a tic since early in the week when I got a "vibe" that something was afoot
- occasionally, right side of mouth also twitches
- lovely pimples, all over my face
- digestive difficulties--even with stomach meds
- chest pains--I hate those the most
- shaking, leading to typing and knitting trouble
- difficulty being around people (not good when the only paying work you have left is teaching--but, I am fine when I am with them, just totally wiped by the time I get home from the effort)
- snapping at kids
- memory lapses and lots of them
- impatience when anyone else talks about THEIR problems, as if mine is the only one (ha ha ha, at least I know that's silly, and have listened enough to remember others have it just as bad as, or worse than me--I am rather ticked at myself for these feelings)
- constant thoughts about vengeful things I would do if I wasn't a pacifist, a person with strong moral convictions and ethics, or nice, which I then mentally berate myself for.
Luckily, I am passing from the anger phase to the grief phase, and will soon be in resignation phase. No denial phase in this personal loss situation. And folks, realize a lot of this is just my grim humor, trying to rouse myself back into SuperSuna mode.
Good news dept: I have an in-person interview with my second job prospect, on Monday. Don't know if I mentioned that. And my kids are fine. And my partner has been really helpful and even applied for two jobs.