Sick in the Head

Last night was the farewell event for my friend Cheri. I feel so lucky to have (finally) made some good friends in Austin in recent months, and sad to see one moving away, though we do read each other's blogs and stuff. A bunch of knitting friends had a nice meal together, and it was good to be with the folks sitting around a different table! It was weird to not be knitting. I will sure be thinking of Cheri as she goes to Colorado, settles in and looks for a career. Though at least she has a fun temp job as a dog walker. That is good exercise, full of affection and not too stressful. Wow, a fine job.

Today was not a good day for my head. My tarot card was the Wheel of Fortune and I pretty much did what it depicts--went through every emotion, from happy to sad to angry to ill to neutral and back again. All day long I felt "odd" and I got extra dizzy at lunch, then again in the late afternoon. Finally, on the way home I realized I had one of those weird migraine-like headaches I used to have in grad school. As I recall from over 20 years ago, it was hard for me to figure those out back then, too. I don't think I've had but one or two of those since that time, either.

I was having a lot of trouble with what I was writing today, and there was something of a misunderstanding with a coworker that led to a bit more than normal stress (mainly because I am trying really hard to be extra easy to get along with and not make things harder on someone who's already having a rough time. I was not happy when another coworker had to take the brunt of complaining about me (though I appreciate his defense of me--I really work with some nice, reasonable folks), so the strain of this, waiting on the job news, and my other random internal struggles probably didn't help the head issue.

But, on the other hand, I have to say I am enjoying the rhythm of work days lately, where I work hard and have very nice coffee and lunch breaks where I get that rare chance to be myself, uncensored. I don't let my guard down a lot, especially after the fiasco at Ye Olde spiritual Community and the distrustful times at the former job. The latter was especially sad when I tried to keep some stuff from my dear pal NJ and she from me so we wouldn't make things worse on each other--she was the one I could just be "me" with before. It's nice we can get back to that again now (though not so nice it has to be by phone, IM and email). For the most part, I am really enjoying getting to know the work folks--Work Man's just a treasure to be with, and like he points out, he really makes me laugh. And I've been enjoying working with the Work Boys, too. I like listening to them talk about movies and politics. I had a nice talk about UUism with another coworker today, and it was refreshing--nice to make the connections. So, that's still all good.

Above and beyond the call of duty--both the boss and Work Man offered to drive me home today. He was the only one left by the time I did leave (not that it was torture, other than the massive traffic jam caused by a bad wreck near my house--I was sorta worried the Older Boy was in it, going to his debate thing, but he wasn't). I hope my car is still there tomorrow morning.

Once I got home I took the fine medicine I have for heads, and slept a few hours. Then the Younger Boy and I watched two movies together, sorta. He actually glommed onto a book Work Man had given me to read, about Celtic Shamanism (cause I wanted to read about the four paths in it). We do a lot of exchanging of materials. I was sort of shocked that Younger Boy got so into the book that he went to another room to read it for an hour or so. Then he came back requesting various aromatherapy oils (for his congestion--he has it BAD) and crystals (not sure for what, but he sure wanted carnelian). So, I went and found him various items--I think he was darned impressed I HAD all those things just lying around the house. What, he forgot my stuff??? He says, "Mom, can I cast a circle? Mom, can I have an ash wand? Can I make a pentacle?" Cracked me up. He really likes that book, and ooh is he jealous that my wand is made of ash (tree was in front of our house in Illinois). Well, now's the time to explore one's spirituality, I guess. It's sweet (and a relief) to see him that interested in anything other than Star Wars Galaxies (his online game). I don't expect he will grow up to be a Celtic Shaman. I know I went through a lot of phases as a young one. Most involving hugging trees, though.

Ha, I ramble. It is nice to have a bit of time to do so, having been so busy lately. I hope to find time this weekend to really work on my Silk Garden sweater this weekend, then finish that vest I was working on. Tomorrow is the usual busy Saturday. Long day knitting, then a party with Work Women. I hope that will be fun!

translation: NOW you can say Lee and I realize that we like each other. But no one talked about it, no one touched anyone else in the car, or at lunch when I was dizzy. One reason I was dizzy, which I didn't mention, was that the entire conversation revolved around about a dozen really weird things Lee and I have in common, and that we talked about some of the kinds of things we hadn't talked about before. I talked more about the real nature of my roommate's and my status, etc. Nobody in these coffee and lunch conversations brought up anything about pairing up or the like. Just about current status. No negative words were spoken about anyone other than my roommate. Note the date here. Mid November.

Comment

Barbara said...
I'm glad you got someone to give you a ride home. No fun feeling less than normal. I hope you continue to feel better. How neat that he got into Celtic Shaman. :)
Saturday, November 18, 2006 3:17:00 PM