Thinking and Shrinking Again

Hey, sorry I didn't type yesterday. It was a rough day, having to repeat in every social situation (work, knitting, choir) how I am still Little Miss Contractor. I was OK most of the day, and just lost it for a few minutes with DP after I left work. But it took a lot of effort to hold together.

I spent the rest of the day thinking about the ethics of Internet privacy. I'll spare you the long thought process, but it occurred to me how important personal ethics are to personal privacy. Eveyone knows nothing is "safe," not email, blogs, nor websites, no matter how many passwords you have or whatever. But, I realized a few days ago that at home, I feel safe, mainly because I and the people in my house (as well as exDH) always respect each other's privacy. I never look at DP's email, or check up on what he has been browsing (don't know how I could--he always turns his machine off when not in use), but I never looked at exDH's either. And vice versa. If we want each other to read or see something, we share. Otherwise, our own things are our business--it is mutual respect. I know it isn't that way for everyone, so I will say I am grateful for that feature of my home.

As for shrinking, I've now lost about 20 pounds this year. I'd let myself creep up in weight again (not near the high from when I lost so much that time, but too high for my pants to fit well). This year, with all the stress and such, it's been going down, and in the last few weeks with all the high stress, it's picked up. I am glad to be within the "OK weight for Suna" zone again (barely), but I am a little concerned, since one reason I haven't eaten much is that my stomach hurts. So, I'll talk about it at the checkup I am scheduling real soon.

The bad thing is I have to go dig out some slightly smaller jeans (it's OK, they go down to a 6 in the bowels of the closet). Luckily the ones I bought last week were pretty tight, so they will last at least another 5 pounds, which is the goal. I am not, not, not going to get down to where I was in 2001, or whenever that big loss happened! A nice, medium 125 will be fine. I lost the double chin, fit into nice 8-10 clothing, and feel OK, too.

translation: I was pretty appalled to think that the STBX was reading Lee's email. And reading my blog, which I had been very careful to not list anywhere, not make searchable, etc. But, I did share it with friends. And you never know what THEY will do with information. Like make it available to people with access to their computers.

Comment

Sam said...
It worries me that you are losing so much weight for the wrong reasons. I think you look perfect the way you are!!!
Thursday, November 30, 2006 8:26:00 PM