Making Joyful Noises, Gratitude Amid Stress

I am glad I went to the first rehearsal of the Round Rock Community Choir last night, even though I was having some big ole stress issues from Lee's job going away. Flashback to last year, sigh. Singing really helped take my mind off troubles, and made me feel better (just like the choir director said it would). The music was neither too easy nor too hard, and though it is incredibly Xtian, that's OK--it's for a Christmas concert. Now, the show tunes they want us to do for Sun City, ick. The director seems excellent, and I am looking forward to learning a lot from her. And my voice mostly worked all right. Only cut out a couple of times. I think it's getting better.

Last night, sitting with Lee and trying to comfort him, I realized that I felt a familiar way. I just looked up one of my favorite posts from just over a year ago, June 2006, when I had just been laid off. It is where I counted my anxiety symptoms. Ooh, they came back for a visit!

Rant On: Now, this post nearly got me fired as a knitting teacher because someone who didn't bother to talk to ME about it, called the LYS owner to say that they thought maybe I was too much of a mess to teach. I laugh about it now. That's one reason I de-linked this blog from the LYS site, my friends' blogs and such. Just so random do-gooders would have less success finding it. It's bad enough so many people who don't speak to me directly continue to read this all the time. It's worse when it's people I don't even know.

(Still not sure why someone would keep up with my daily ups and downs so obsessively but not ever tell me hello in person or at least leave a comment...but I guess we're all different, huh! So, hello to Sherwood, Jacksonville, Cedar Park and beyond!) Rant Off. I just need to make this point every couple of months, I guess.

Back to my main point--I can really see that job stress gets to me more than a lot of other stuff. Even Lee's. I am doing a lot better today, mainly because I have a lot more confidence in his marketability than mine. There's no 15-year gap filled only by a questional nonprofit organization gig to have to explain, for one thing. He's done some great stuff, and really deserves a better place to do more good work.

So, goodbye to my symptoms and hello to the positive outlook I eventually get to anyway. Doors closing means others open, and all those cliches.

Gratitude Tuesday (I was a bit stressed to say what I was grateful for yesterday):

I am grateful to you, my friends. Thanks to everyone who's emailed me and given suggestions and support to both me and Lee. They are both always welcome and very much apppreciated. Now I'll go sing something, at least in my head! It does one's spirit a world of good.

I am also so very grateful that Lee and I have each other now, so when the poop rains on our heads, we have someone holding a newspaper to deflect it.